Former Strictly Come Dancing South Africa presenter Ian von Memerty has issued a raw and defiant response to critics of his views on assisted dying, clapping back at online backlash in a deeply personal Facebook reaction video.
Von Memerty, who has recently spoken openly about his plans and beliefs around assisted dying, said the latest episode in his weekly YouTube and Facebook series, Dying for a Better Life, was the most painful yet – not because of the topic itself, but because it involved “the people I love”.
While he expressed gratitude for the kindness he received, he said the vulnerability also “brought out the worst of the internet”.
Why Ian von Memerty’s stance on assisted dying ignites debate
For decades, Ian von Memerty has been a warm and entertaining presence on South African television, best known as a presenter and judge on Strictly Come Dancing.
The multi-talented performer also judged the first four seasons of SA’s Got Talent, has been at the helm of dozens of live shows and worked behind the scenes as a writer and director.
His latest chapter, however, sees him stepping into far more serious territory – using his public profile to question how society defines compassion at the end of life.
A deeply personal motivation
Von Memerty has previously revealed that his position on assisted dying stems from painful first-hand experiences.
In an interview with You Magazine, he recalled witnessing his parents’ “painfully slow” deaths – a process he says stripped them of dignity and left lasting emotional scars.
According to Von Memerty, those moments cemented his resolve to avoid a similar fate and to advocate for personal autonomy at the end of life.
“I watched people I loved suffer unnecessarily,” he explained, adding that it fundamentally changed how he views death, choice and compassion.
‘An Enid Blyton bit of philosophy’ won’t fix this – Von Memerty
The former entertainer’s decision to speak openly has been praised by some for its honesty, while others have criticised it as controversial.
In his most recent Facebook video posted on Tuesday afternoon, Von Memerty addressed comments telling him to “pull himself together” and stop “making a spectacle” of himself – criticism he dismissed sharply.
He described such advice as “that little bit of Enid Blyton philosophy”, saying it was naïve to think platitudes could undo decades of lived reality.
Von Memerty also revealed he was told to “just do it” by some commenters, and accused others of oversimplifying his situation by telling him to “get up and make a plan”.
“I’ve been doing that for 40 years,” the 61-year-old veteran entertainer said, explaining that if it were possible to simply fix things, he would have done so already.
Ian von Memerty rejects claims of ‘death as performance’
Autonomy, not attention
Von Memerty also pushed back against accusations that he was chasing attention or treating death as a public performance.
Claims that he was seeking “15 minutes of extra fame” struck a nerve, particularly the suggestion that questions of choice, power, and autonomy in old age were irrelevant.
He rejected that outright, saying the issue is far bigger than individual opinions – or internet outrage.
The renowned SA’s Got Talent celebrity judge revealed that he was being called “selfish, cowardly and self-centred”, but argued that choosing what he believes is the “least bad option” is neither cowardly nor irresponsible.
Why does he say silence is part of the problem
‘This is why people suffer in shame’
In one of the most powerful moments of the video, Von Memerty said public cruelty is exactly why many people facing end-of-life decisions suffer in silence.
According to him, barking beliefs and moral superiority at vulnerable people strips them of humanity – and reinforces fear and shame around dying.
“That’s why I have to keep speaking out,” he said, adding that assisted dying is ultimately a human rights issue, not a personal publicity exercise.
WATCH: Ian von Memerty claps back at critics
‘Die well’: Ian von Memerty advocates for ‘self-deliverance’
The former Strictly Come Dancing host’s comments come at a time when assisted dying remains illegal in South Africa, despite growing public discourse and legal challenges seeking reform.
As well as exploring the realities, choices and responsibilities around ageing and what it means to “die well”, he advocates for “self-deliverance” to be recognised, legalised and supported as a moral and humane option for people who want to end their lives.
Choosing the ‘when and how’
Self-deliverance isn’t assisted dying, which requires legal and medical access many don’t have, and which needs another person to shoulder the responsibility for ending a life, he explained.
For Von Memerty, self-deliverance means being responsible and choosing the “when and how”, which should always be peaceful and non-violent.
“In a world where we can change our gender, our careers, our beliefs, our hair, our nationalities, our relationships – why are we not allowed any choice in the one thing that’s a certainty in everyone’s life?”
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